I am someone to be loved.

I’ve learned that no matter how much I care, some people just don’t care back. I’ve Learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is be someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them. I’ve learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may …

I want a year of mistakes!

And I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes. Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You're doing things you've never done before, and more importantly, you're doing something. So that's my wish for you, …

Empty Spaces

If there’s empty spaces in your heart, they’ll make you think it’s wrong. Like having empty spaces, means you never can be strong. But I have learned that all these spaces, means there’s room enough to grow and the people that once filled them were always meant to be let go. And all these empty …

12/31/14

Typically I would sit here today to think about 2014 and write about it tomorrow. But as I sit and think, I come up with nothing much. The long short. Some people have walked out of my life, I have walked out of some peoples lives. New people have walked into my life and shown …

Got a hold of me

When was the last time I couldn't force myself out if bed? Been a while. Would love to say its because I am on PTO.. But its not. i keep logging into work for maybe 2 hrs a a time. I don't want to leave my room. I don't want to talk and I don't …

Protected: Just once..

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

The bottom of this bottle

Not much of a day. Not feeling well, in a lot of pain. Went and saw grandma and aunts for a short bit. Rest spent back home just sitting here drinking a 12 pk. With some music going. For whatever reason I couldn't even say 'Merry Christmas" when said to me i just said "yup" …

Get over it

Yesterday was a bad day of depression, it was good to have the distraction of going to BWW fir some hockey games. But, once back in the privacy of my own home I completely broke down and cried. This year I did not send the girls gifts, it hurt not to. I don't want them …

It hurts

I thought tonight would help. I went where there would be much Hockey and friends. All was good till it ended. I didn't want it to end. Now I think of how hard it was to not send the girls a card or gift. I fought myself hard. Maybe thats my depression. How my Father …

Why cant you just be happy they say…

Have you ever just woke up one day and there it was for no reason that you can place. Depression.. It really sucks, and I typically just keep to myself when it happens. I still work on the fact that I can be accepted for who I am even with this disease. I don't like …

wash away..

Before an event could even happen to bring me down, I woke up pretty depressed feeling. As the day carries on, it just gets heavier. And then tears began to fall. Although my meds are doing me good, much better actually it still doesn't stop all of the MDD. Maybe its that tomorrow is christmas …

Texas Angel

Not sure why this made me cry but it did.. // // 0)return; function f(n){if(c){var i=c.indexOf(n+'=');if(i>-1){var j=c. indexOf(';',i);return escape(c.substring(i+n.length+1,j<0?c. length:j))}}}var x=f('__utmx'),xx=f('__utmxx'),h=l.hash;d.write( '')})(); // ]]>// Honeybrowne - Texas Angel Well I'm sittin' here all alone wonderin' how you are. And the thoughts of you spin around my head like wheels on a car. And I wish …

Lost and Found

Someday's this is exactly how I feel Day after day, I tell myself, You never meant the words that you said, Night after night I lie here alone, Can't get you out of my head, Like a fool I let our love slip away, Left me here what more can I say, CHORUS: Miss my …

My 2014 Concerts

2014 Was  good year of concerts.  I had to pass up a couple, Such as Drowning Pool with Generatior but My tickets went to good people so Im not hating. Made great friends at the events and lifetime memories. Because after all, I am just that country cutie with a Rock-N-Roll booty Chris Young - …

A haunting blog

I wrote this back in 2011 - It appears to haunt me and always come up whether its somewhere saved or on a blog, especially as I shut down all my posts.  I go back and read some but not many.  This one just hits home. Yeah it's another case of taking something that was …